Emotional Competence
To build inner Coherence, and ultimately find harmony with the world as it exists now, the first major task is to improve our emotional competency. Emotional Competence refers to one's ability to express or release one's inner feelings and emotions in positive or productive ways. It allows the ease to communicate with other people, the ability to face stressful challenges without indulging in destructive behaviors, and determines one's ability to effectively and successfully self-lead and communicate in social situations. Emotional Competence is an essential social skill to recognize and interpret, including the capacity to respond positively to emotions in our selves and others. Emotional competence creates an increased energetic coherence, as well as improved health, through avoiding stress that comes as the result of suppressed emotions. It leads to improved relationships since destructive emotions are far less likely to be expressed, while appropriate communication is not avoided through unhealed fears of triggering some unwanted emotion. We all can learn to free ourselves from anger, hate, resentment, vengeance, and other destructive emotions that cause hurt and pain.
When strengthening our character, by increasing our tolerance and Compassion for others, we help to develop Emotional Competence, as well as more confidence and Self Esteem. These qualities help us to have a better understanding and interpretation of what is actually happening around us, which increases our accuracy in the Discernment of events. Negative and destructive emotions that are suppressed and hidden greatly cloud our discernment and interpretation of events in our life.
- What emotions can you recognize and describe?
- How well can you interpret what your emotions are telling you?
- How successfully do you respond to emotions in yourself and others?
Without personal goals of desiring to increase our emotional competence and being honest with ourselves, we risk playing out destructive emotions in our self-talk, and when interacting with others. Unfortunately, if we do not heal our negative emotions, we will become prisoners of this inner violence, without understanding why we have been consumed in pain throughout so much of our lives. When we are prisoners of our own Inner Violence, we are in bondage to the negative behaviors that fuel levels of psychosis or neurosis. This unhealed state of inner violence leads to splitting behaviors of the Negative Ego. As a result of the bifurcation, if unhealed inner violence is still present, these uncleared negative energies create a lot of pain and suffering that commonly produce Splitting Behaviors in people. (For more tools see www.emotionalcompetency.com)[1]
Emotional Self-Regulation
Emotional Self-Regulation or regulation of emotion is the ability to respond to the ongoing demands of life experiences with the range of emotions in a balanced manner that is spiritually healthy and supportive for the individual, the purpose is to reduce or eliminate self harming behaviors as a result of a lack of Impulse Control. Emotional Self-Regulation is directly related to increasing ones Emotional Competence and Coherence.
It can also be defined as extrinsic and intrinsic processes responsible for monitoring, evaluating, and modifying emotional reactions. Emotion self-regulation belongs to the broader set of emotion-regulation processes, which includes the regulation of one's own feelings and the regulation of perception over other people's feelings.[2]
Emotional Intelligence
On the pathway of Spiritual Ascension, we are constantly challenged to address and heal our Pain Body in so that we can increase Emotional Intelligence which leads to emotional balance. Emotions are like a spectrum of color we can choose when painting the color palette of our life landscape. When we use a certain emotional color, we must realize that we can choose another emotional color and paint over the previous colors which creates a different landscape. Emotions are energetic intelligence that create a color wave spectrum. One does not have to remain stuck in an emotional state if they learn to shift the emotional state through shifting thoughts. If we do not know how to monitor our emotional state and learn to choose consciously our mental attitudes that shape how we feel, we can feel at the mercy of the unhealed instinctual mind or Pain Body. When the pain body is unhealed, and the ego is dominating ones thoughts, the unhealed emotions buried within the body can surface with Mental Triggers. This may feel like a banshee whipping us with uncontrollable amounts of painful or negative emotions.
Emotional Body Goals
It is only possible to engage with Emotional Healing once we have achieved greater levels of Self Awareness, which is the fruit of dedicated self-inquiry. The process of becoming aware of our Emotional Triggers and sourcing the real cause of emotional pain is made through self-observation and increased self-awareness. Through dedicated observation of the self and gradually discerning between these functioning aspects of the mind, one can attain the direct experience of the Consciousness they are. The still point of which this consciousness connects into the parts of our mind is that which forms all of our thoughts, emotions, and experiences that direct us through life. Through observation and self-inquiry, we become aware of the contents of our psychological and emotional patterns of behavior. See Emotional Body Goals.